4 Apps for Surviving Motherhood

I struggle. A lot. I feel like I shouldn't be struggling so much because somehow everyone else must have this whole raising kids, homeschooling, doing ministry thing worked out. And, maybe they do, but I'm guessing there are at least a few moms out there who, like me, feel constantly overwhelmed and a little lost in life. I mean, even now, while trying to type this first paragraph I have been interrupted multiple times, have had to get up at least 3 times to discipline my wayward toddler, and have spent at least 15 minutes trying to defuse ADHD outbursts.

I feel like I can never get anything done, which is extremely defeating for this check-off-the-to-do-list person! Now, I know, taking care of discipline and working through emotional outbursts and doing the laundry (after your baby has spit up on herself and YOU for the FOURTH time that day) is important but it is hard and often lonely work. "The Joy of the Lord is Your Strength," my theme for 2017, has been a constant prayer, and yet I still struggle.

Often I hear people talk about the theology behind what moms do or remind us of priorities but sometimes I just wish someone could tell me a few practical steps to manage it all, dang it!! How do I get it all done? How do I manage to not lose myself? How do I find time to be with the Lord? How do I fight off the loneliness? I need something practical that I can apply to my day and help me get through and that won't make me feel shame and guilt if I don't execute perfectly!

So, I want to share with you 4 apps that i use on my phone that make a difference for me in the midst of the hard, the lonely, and the overwhelming. They aren't life-changers but, really, I'll take anything at this point, right?

The Daily Audio Bible
I found this app when a friend and I were talking about how to spend more time in the Scripture, when we never seemed to have the time or emotional energy to do a traditional "quiet time." As a busy, exhausted mom of little kids I'm trying to embrace the Susanna Wesley approach to spirituality (mom of John Wesley, and 9 other kids, who would throw her apron over her head in order to have prayer time amid the chaos).

It's hard to find the space for deep, quiet study in my life right now, although it is important to find some time for that too. So instead I am embracing this season of life and looking for ways to infiltrate my days with short prayers, small doses of scripture, and--for lack of a better word--mindfulness. I made my phone lock screen a picture of my theme verse. I wear a necklace a friend gave me that represents seeking the joy of the Lord. I say a prayer for a friend when I see her photo pop up on Facebook. And, I use the Daily Audio Bible app. It's $0.99 and worth all 99 pennies.

Your Bible guide, Brian, (and his sometimes over the top background nature soundtrack) reads through the Bible in a year and you can listen along! You can select the link for the whole daily reading for that day, which includes the Old Testament, New Testament, Psalm, & Proverbs and his commentary on the passages at the end, or just choose one of those to listen to. It even has the readings in other languages and a reading for kids where Brian's daughter reads the New Testament passage for the day. I listen while I get ready or make dinner or do laundry. It also has the super cool acronym of DAB, so my friend asks me if I DABed today :).

Voxer

Momming can be lonely. Especially when you're a homeschooling, work-from-home mom! I'm an Introvert but even I need a few relationships in my life! Most of my family and friends live out of state and I am not a phone person. Even if I was, it seems impossible to coordinate time to talk with my family and friends between everyone's family schedules, work schedules, and different time zones. But, a few years ago a friend introduced me to the Voxer app and we've been voxering ever since!

This is a free app (although there is an upgraded version for a fee) in which you can send voice messages to people. It's the next best thing to a phone conversation and is WAY more convenient for a mom with young kids (and an introvert). I can listen to my friend's message when I have a minute and send her a response the next time my kids have stopped wrestling and screaming! I can send my sister a message while she's at work and then she and my niece can send one back with she gets home. Sometimes I Voxer in real time with folks but other times it's just a fun way to let someone know you're thinking of them or tell them a funny story without having to figure out schedules for a phone call.

Google Calendar

I'm schedule oriented...my husband is not! Trying to juggle the kids' schedules and family events and our constantly changing ministry schedules is impossible without clear coordination. Being able to share calendars is awesome. My husband MUST add all meetings to his calendar (which I can view) on pain of death :). Our life is run by Google Calendar! But another feature that I love on the mobile app is the "Reminder." I put all the random things I need to do that I think I will remember, but never actually remember, in as a "Reminder" and try to schedule it for a time I think I will have a moment to take care of that task. It will even automatically link phone numbers or emails, etc., if, for example, the task is to contact someone. Awesome! Even if I don't get to the task at that moment it will roll over each day until I mark it done. And it feels so nice to check that "Done" button!

Evernote

If you haven't noticed, I'm a list person and Evernote is a great, free app for lists and so much more! My use of Evernote is pretty basic compared to what it can do, but it's a great way to keep things in one place and easily accessible from my computer to my phone. I feel like, as a Mom, I constantly have a million things scrolling through my mind: to-do lists, research on issues with kids, school, work and this app helps me try to stay on top of it all.

Sometimes I use it as a place to dump info about different topics, like when I'm researching homeschool curriculum, and store all my thoughts and lists and links in one "Note." Other times I make a Note with a specific list like when we are travelling and I make a packing list with our 500 bajillion items so I don't forget anything. I use it for work to take notes or organize task lists. And, have I mentioned that when making lists it gives you a little check box next to the task that you can ACTUALLY CHECK OFF!!!??


Nothing can make this mom-gig easy, but sometimes it's the little helps that get you through the day. These are my top 4 survival apps. What are yours?

The Joy of the Lord is your Strength

Early last year the Lord gave me the phrase "Work smarter with a heart at peace." It spoke to the season I was in of needing to prioritize life and ministry in order to survive and my desperate need to embrace the peace of Christ that surpasses all understanding in the face of life's constant transitions and anxieties. I still have so far to go in these areas but the practice of using this phrase as an encouragement, rebuke, and guiding principle for the year fostered so much growth.

I didn't intentionally choose a new focus for this year, but in the past couple of months the Lord has been unmistakably speaking to me of joy and its connection to my strength for the day. 

I'm in a tough season of life for me personally: a task-oriented introvert deep in the chaos of young children and homeschooling, with a newborn arriving imminently and household and ministry responsibilities leaving a growing line of check boxes that glare at and goad me with their emptiness. 

Most days I feel like I am just surviving. I get frustrated and angry and resentful and feel so alone...and yet NEVER ALONE. Deep, pervasive joy is hard for me to imagine in the face of daily monotony and zombie exhaustion. Oh sure, there is joy in listening to my kids' laughter or seeing the Lord do a mighty work in a ministry event but the strength to meet each moment of the day with determined joy? It seems an impossible dream. And then I worry that by my example I will teach my children that following the Lord is a joyless and impossible task, and parenting is a burden best just gotten through--neither of which are the truth. 

And then one day a few weeks ago the Lord brought to mind Nehemiah 8.10 - "The joy of the Lord is your strength." I felt the words rush in and settle down through my body and into my soul and I felt desperate for the hope of it. 

Joy.

Strength.

Yes. I instantly recognized the deep need for these in my life.

And so, in the weeks that have followed--being 8 months pregnant, moving, homeschooling, mothering a challenging toddler, and stepping into new life and ministry responsibilities--I have found myself breathing this verse out as a desperate prayer and life-saving promise when I have felt too inadequate and burdened and exhausted to conquer the task at hand. It is followed quickly by the prayer, "Lord, teach me what that even means" because it is clear that I don't understand it yet.

As I meditate on this verse throughout the year I'm asking the Lord to show me what it means to live into His joy and to be able to look at the future (whether it is the hours, months, or years ahead of me) with strength and joy instead of panic and discouragement. 

I trust that He will answer my request because He is a good Father. And, so, I am going to rest in the knowledge that this isn't just one more thing I have to do this year, but something that can, and will, be poured into my weary self as I draw near to the Lord.

With that, my few precious moments alone are drawing to a close and as I get back in my van to drive back to the responsibilities of the rest of the day I am tempted to feel discouraged, but instead I will repeat "The joy of the Lord is your strength."

Amen.

____

Image from French Press Mornings